ONE DAY YOU'LL REALIZE YOUR FATHER WAS JUST A HUMAN! 🙏
I'm very blessed and thankful for how I was raised because it helped me turn out the way I did. You know what, man? You have to talk to me about that, because I think every guest I’ve brought on has always said, “man, the upbringing from the father's standpoint was always a little bit rougher, but in a way, do you feel like, man, we needed that?" That's something I feel like. Maybe not overly aggressive towards us, but, man, I needed a stern father, especially with me.
The Blessings of a Firm Upbringing
I didn't always appreciate how stern my father was. There were times when it felt too much. How do you feel? Like, do you, in ways, do you appreciate how stern he was, and what have you taken from that to put on yourself?
Idolize, Demonize, and Humanize
I definitely appreciate it now, for sure. When it was happening, of course not. And it’s funny because I saw this guy I follow a lot, Patrick Bet-David, talking about how as a child, you go through three different phases with your parents:
1. Idolize: Growing up, they're your hero.
2. Demonize: At some point, they become like, "Oh, my dad's old. He doesn’t know what he's talking about."
3. Humanize: Later on, you realize, "Hey, they're just humans, just like you," and there's this humanization to it.
You go through three phases with your parents: Idolize, Demonize, and Humanize.
The Humanization and Respect
At some point, they become human, and you get more respect. You become more respectful of how you were raised, and you really enjoy what happened. You realize that it was important.
Reflecting on Parental Influence
Thinking back, the strictness and sternness of my father’s ways embedded values in me that have shaped who I am today.
1. Discipline: It's a crucial trait that he enforced, and though it felt challenging, it’s something I hold dear now.
2. Respect: Understanding the boundaries of respect and why it’s essential.
3. Resilience: The toughness and ability to withstand adversities come from that tough-love upbringing.
Appreciating the Tough Lessons
Growing up, we don’t often understand the rigid rules. Kids don't generally appreciate the stern “no,” the high expectations, or the rigorous disciplines enforced by their parents, especially fathers. It’s only when we gain more life experience that we start to value those lessons.
The Journey of Understanding
What Patrick Bet-David articulated about idolizing, demonizing, and eventually humanizing our parents is incredibly accurate. It's a journey that brings more profound respect and appreciation.
1. Idolizing Stage: We look up to them like they're superheroes.
2. Demonizing Stage: Mirroring what Patrick said, during our rebellious years, we feel they just don’t get it.
3. Humanizing Stage: Ultimately, the humanization of parents makes you see them as individuals with their own struggles and experiences.
It’s an enlightening transformation.
Key Takeaways
Patience and Understanding: Gaining a more in-depth perspective of where our parents were coming from.
Gratitude: Feeling grateful for the upbringing, regardless of the challenges.
Growth: Personal growth in character as a direct result of those tough times.
Final Thoughts
One day, you’ll realize your father was just a human, doing his best with what he had. Embrace the phases of your relationship with him, for they’re pivotal in shaping who you are.
There you have it—a rich reflection on how our relationships with our parents evolve. What phases have you gone through with your father? Share your thoughts in the comments below!
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Remember, appreciating our childhood and those who shaped us is vital for personal growth. Stay blessed and be thankful.